Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
