she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
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