Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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