I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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