Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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