guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Life is so much better after having sex.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
