were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
