omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize