Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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