the day after is always just damage control
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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