Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
