It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Who died my cat blue again?
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