he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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