..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I lost the right to judge tonight
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
