im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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