My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
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