too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize