Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
