Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Randomize
