hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize