i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
