It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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