I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
