Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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