it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
