dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize