It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
