My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Randomize
