my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
