He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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