Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
