My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize