So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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