Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Randomize
