where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Buhtt sex?
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Randomize
