i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
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