Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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