I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Sponge bath it is.
Nicole vs. Life
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Randomize
