i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
