Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
