Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
