kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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