I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
COCAINE IS GR8
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
