Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Randomize
