Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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