idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
