even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
