My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
