We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
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