I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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