is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
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