no. you can't hotbox the world.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
I can't turn off my feet"
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I know where his drugs are but not my pants